"Nurse Smith, who do we have on the hospital team to draw blood today since the phlebotomists have all been cut back?"
"Uh, Sir, we've just contracted with the grounds crew and they're sending up three of their best gardeners and also a tree surgeon with experience in tapping for maple syrup."
"Very well, and what about surgery _ the anesthesiology team?"
"That's taken care of too, Sir. We have the gas company coming in to turn on the valves."
"And the surgical assistants?"
"The hospital cook said he'd be right up after cutting up the chickens, Sir."
"Still, that's only a small part of our getting ready for the day. What about our I.V. crew?"
"Right again, Sir. Since they have experience with transporting plastic bags on a daily basis, there are four custodians due any minute from Maintenance."
"Great choice, Nurse Smith. And what about Radiology?"
"We're in good shape. We've got 'Flash' Jones, the hospital's public relations department photographer, all set to process the films."
"How about ICU and CCU?"
"Ready there, too, Sir. The hospital's Watchful Eye Day Care Center personnel have consented to take over these services."
"Gracious, Nurse Smith. I think I needn't ask you about the rest of the facility. 'Seems we're in great shape all around. I'm ready to report our progress to the medical staff."
"Er, uh, Sir, there IS one small problem."
"Oh, and what's that, Nurse Smith?"
"Our doctors are all taking a continuing education course at the medical center in the next town down the road."
"What are they doing there, Nurse?"
"They're enrolled in a class called 'How to Empty a Bedpan Like a True Professional'."
___Another Mystery
Practically no sooner than I had solved one musical mystery a week or two ago, another has surfaced.
After Bob'n'Along appeared in Tuesday's editions of the Telegram, I received a call that evening from a Mrs. Vance, who was curious as to whether I knew anyone who'd know where she could find the sheet music for a song, "Clarksburg, My Home Town."
Now I can't say that I'm even familiar with the piece, but I told Mrs. Vance I'd be glad to mention it in today's column. So if anyone might be familiar with where that caller might find the sheet music to that song, please let me know where and I'll use it in an upcoming column.
___Further Response
On Wednesday, another person called about Bob'n'Along. Jim "Mutt" Ash of Bridgeport was curious, also, about the "Drug Store Cowboys."
I mentioned that I knew next to nothing about the group, historically speaking.
Again, I'll use any bit of information about them that I receive from readers. And thanks, Mr. Ash, for your support.
Comments are welcome in care of the Clarksburg Telegram, P.O. Box 2250, Clarksburg, W.Va. 26302-2250 or via e-mail Webmaster@cpubco.com.
Updated January 22, 1997
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